(Michael’s well-earned rest after patrolling for creatures all night.)

I was awake for a couple of hours last night (which happens more than I would like) and I thought I heard some creature bumping around in the house. Now, we have a cat (Michael) who enjoys knocking things down, so it could have been him. But it’s possible that it could have been some other creature. Which, come to think of it, also happens more than I would like. I don’t know if it’s because we have an old house or because we live in the country or what, but over the past nine years things have found their way in. Here are some of the highlights:

Bee: Unfortunately John stepped on — and was stung by — this bee right next to his toy box. He was two, now he’s almost five, but we still talk about it regularly.

Mouse #1: This mouse had a stand-off with our late cat, Fee. The mouse won the standoff. Fee ran off to the closet to hide. We captured the tiny, grey mouse in a trash can and took him away.

Mouse #2: Mouse encountered Michael instead of Fee. Bad news for him, because Michael is a cat who knows what to do with a mouse. In this case, killing it and leaving right by my bed to find in the morning. He’s been on full alert for mice ever since.

Bird: We think this bird might have gotten down our chimney by mistake. He then flew into some blinds at a window and ended up with head in the blinds and wings flapping behind. Maybe not the smartest bird around. Matt grabbed him and put him back outside.

Bat #1: We were amateurs for this bat. We taped sheets up over the kitchen doorways (no doors in the kitchen), shooed him in there, and then cowered behind the sheets until we were sure he’d flown out the door.

Bat #2: I was out of town, but I understand Matt handled this one by walking around the house on the roof in the middle of the night to open a door to let him out. Safety first!

Bat #3a: This time a bat was in the guest room with our friend Susan and her daughter. Embarrassing. We evacuated the guests and then went to look for the bat, who had gone missing…

Bat #3b: …only to reemerge two weeks later in our room in the middle of the night. This time I was really mad about it, so I shut myself in the room with the bat and chased it with a broom until I could smack it out the door.

Bat #4: Now seasoned in bat removal, I captured this one with John’s lacrosse stick and a broom, and carried him out that way. For what it’s worth, I’m not as upset about this bat fungus situation as I probably should be. I’ve had it with bats.

Also worth an honorable mention: the rabbits living under our porch. From what I can tell it is Watership Down under there. They seem both large and plentiful. I just hope they don’t decide to come inside.